The Tittie Jiggle Shuffle

Dusty Rhodes vs. Stan Hansen - NJPW - 5/16/1980

So a little trivia I read on the internet that I'm choosing to believe because it's on the internet.  See the fan Hansen had an altercation with on the way to the ring, apparently he was a local nut bag who went by the name... ready for this... Fart Nasty.  Apparently, he got this nickname because he had a reputation for farting on wrestlers and celebs and on this night, he was conjuring up one good shit storm.  I got this from a comment I read about this match by a dude who was apparently there.  I'm choosing to believe it.  I know liars, and I don't think he's one of those guys.

Back before we had Divas, it was Dusty Rhodes who jiggled titties in wrestling, and he's up there with the best of the Divas at being able to do it.  You might even say it was unintentional.  Dusty epitomizes what's great about wrestling - a fat guy who's somehow fit as a fiddle working his ass off.  Hansen is in the same boat as this - only more of a ''I'll punch fuck out of your skull and grind my knees off your face repeatedly'' type of guy.  They don't make them like this these days (I'm talking like this was from back in my day.  I was -9 and yet to be conceived when this match took place.  Even my mum was a teenager back then and she didn't get impregnated till her 20's).

This match is fucking superb.  As soon as it starts we have a fat, pasty, beautiful Dusty Rhodes delivering the best shuffle punching I've ever seen in my life.  It's like watching a baby elephant write poetry.  This just pisses Hansen off more and it's not long before he's sucking the fun out of the environment and dictating the match on his terms - but that's why we love Hansen.  No shit kinda guy.  The match is more or less a chaotic brawl, but this is the type of match that works for these 2 and they do it better than just about everybody.  It goes out the ring and back into the ring, there's chairs and there's turnbuckle posts being used to hurt the opponent, and Dusty gallops off those ropes like a beautiful jiggly stallion.  Like a war horse straight from Heaven.

The match ends on a count out and big ''WOOOOOOOOOOOO'' from Hansen, so overall a mindblowing experience.